Out of sight but not out of mind...

Out of sight but not out of mind!
By Delroy Nesta Williams

Feeling like a poor man
Running out of time
Living but not really alive
So much going on all around me
But no one to share it with
Can't see my reflection in your eyes
Or be the reason for your smile
Even your harsh words would be music to my ears
But the silence only adds to my fears
And compound the hurt and pain
That I will live out my life all alone
An incomplete feeling haunts me
My nightmare has become a reality
Wish I could go back to yesterday
And say all the things that I needed to say
Things I was to shy to utter
Things that pride made me swallow
I'm tired of the regret
Fed up of the faux quiet (calmness)
When I'm raging like a storm inside
My feelings I can no longer hide
I keep crying myself to sleep at nights
At the thought that I've lost your love
Conflict lives within my soul
An emotion I can no longer control
This numbness was simply pretense
Deep inside I'm raging like a boiling pot
I need to put an end to this, I need the hurt to stop
It's worst during the dead of night
When I've only got my thoughts and feelings
Then everything comes back to me:
How I ran away from love
How I was afraid to take the jump
And now I'm screaming, crying out
But I've got no one to blame
I've got only the scars and shame
Can't go back in time
Can't add reason to the rhyme
So I will just wallow in my sadness
And hope that with tomorrow comes a newness
But that's just wishful thinking
Cause you're gonna be absent from my reality
And so my sorrow continues
Because it's too late, too late
I've already sealed my fate
You are no longer mine
Because just like a poor man
I've ran out of time.

a new offering... true story... Untitled R&B

forgot to post this in here the other day:


This is a true story
The pen jus seemed to grab my hand
Some things I just can't understand
Sometimes you just have to go with the flow
In the end it will all make sense:

Untitled (R&B)

How you waited till I wrote you my love letter
To tell me we can't be together
From awakening my soul with hugs and kisses
To breaking me into a million bits and pieces
My world turned upside down in a matter of minutes
I had guarded my feelings for so long
Until you came along
I took a risk opening up to you like no other
But in the end all you've managed to do was expose my deepest fears
And now for the first time in so many years
Girl, you've got me shedding tears
I was already planning my future around you
Thought our love was shared, thought it was true
I accepted your daughter as mine
Loved her like she came from my own blood line
I loved you with all your flaws
Because that's just what true love does
Takes the good with the bad, hoping for the best
Now my mind will never be at rest
Wondering what I could have done different
A tender touch by here, a phone call by there?
All these questions plaguing my mind
All these emotions of the troubling kind
Wish I could smile but all that comes out is this lowly sigh
I couldn't even utter a word when you said goodbye
So shocked I was at what just transpired
Like the boss walked into my office to say I was fired
From this job I've looked for all my life
I really thought you would have been my wife
I wanted you to be the last one that I would ever love
Until I depart this earth to meet the maker up above
All I feel now is hurt and depressed
Because I don't want anybody else
I will grow to accept that you're gone
What's done, is done
I'm prepared to grow old n lonely
If you're not the one for me,
Then who can it be?
You seemed so perfect for me

The One

Wrote this poem last night while reflecting on my life and relationships:

The One
Can quickly become just another one,
And you’re left with no one
As the one you loved is now gone;
You find yourself still searching for someone
And suddenly, you start considering anyone,
Because your age starts to creep up one by one.
You’re no longer twenty one, But thirty or forty one...
And the biological clock ticks away past the day you were born.
Out of the blue you start to feel the emptiness of being only one,
A seclusion that can send anyone
Scrambling to be with someone.
At the end of it all, no one likes to be just one.

Untitled poem

I almost lost this "gem" of a poem, had it stored in my blackberry and was a second away from deleting it... but still thanks to technology. So now, i'm sharing it, enjoy. I haven't decided on a title yet so for now, it's an untitled poem.

Untitled

By Delroy Nesta Williams

Love songs are like daggers to your heart

When love has left and the situation is tearing you apart.

Late at night when the world is asleep

With only your thoughts to comfort you

While you silently weep.

The moment when you realize all you've lost

And the one that mattered most is no longer around.

Suddenly cognizant that it's all your doing

And no matter your action to mend your heart,

You're left in ruins.

A jigsaw puzzle with a missing piece,

Your heart will never again find peace.

Loneliness is strange company

Comes and go as it feels,

Does as it pleases,

Exposes feelings that you've tried so hard to hide

And you're just hurting inside.

No need to suppress it,

You should try to expose it,

But pride always gets the better of you

And keeps you running from the truth.

You’re afraid of being hurt again,

But you end up harming yourself instead

And there's no one else to blame,

No one can help to mend the heart's pain.

A sea of tears lost in the rain.

No one can decipher your thoughts if you don't scream out

Sometimes what you're thinking isn't enough,

You've got to scream out, you've got to shout,

So someone will take notice,

Help you along love's journey

For it can be a painful road to travel alone,

As the path is unchartered territory…