Friday, September 7, 2012

Walking Away - Domestic Violence poem



I wrote this poem to raise awareness about Domestic Violence after two significant events took place over the past few weeks. First of all, the CARICOM Youth Ambassadors (some of whom are my friends) have started to raise awareness about this issue by having various events aimed at sensitizing the public about the issue. ORANGE DAY, as it is called, is being held on the 25th of every month.

Yesterday a friend invited me to join a Facebook group dedicated to help women and children who are victims of Domestic Violence and need support to get out of their dire situation. After having a conversation with her and seeing the exchanges in the group, i was moved to pen this poem below, please enjoy...

Walking Away
by Delroy Nesta Williams

That’s where I draw the line
Don’t you dare raise your damn hand on me one more time
I’m tired of the bruises and the scares
I’m nobody’s punching bag
It took me a while to get to this point
But thank God I’ve arrived and I’m not turning back
The load is finally off my back
When I sit and think
How many times I blamed myself for the abuse
Maybe the tea was too sweet
I didn’t make up the bed with the right sheets
I’ve questioned my every action
I’ve second guessed my every thought
For a man who treated me like I was naught
But it’s over now
At first I stayed because I thought this was love
And then I had your son
I thought it would stop after I gave birth to your seed
But that just seemed to add fuel to the fire
And blows was all that I received
It wasn’t my fault that the baby cried at nights
Or that he needed more of my attention that you did
I didn’t replace you with him
But that’s just how you made me feel
I couldn’t do anything right when it came to you
And that made me feel so empty and blue
I would have done anything for you
Carried the world on my back if you asked me too
My 15 years of abuse is much more than one woman should take
So much more, but I still leave with a heartache
Because I truly loved you
That maybe made me blind to all the abuse
At least, you didn’t claim my soul
That would have been the nail in my coffin
And that I just can’t allow our son to behold
I’ve tried to raise him to be better than you
Hopefully he won’t do the same things you did
I will teach him how to love a woman
A real man never raises his hands
I’ve packed my bags, nothing can let me stay
I just wanted to be a woman
Say goodbye and let you watch me walk away
Don’t you even thinking of trying to stop me
Or raise your hands to even touch me
I don’t want any sorry excuse
You had years to consider the extent of your abuse
Nights spent crying myself to sleep
I couldn’t do anything, only weep
Soaking my pillow in tears
Lost in a world of fear
I wouldn’t wish this on my greatest enemy
You tried your best but you still didn’t break me
It’s time to set my spirit free
A weight has been lifted off my shoulders
I feel like dancing under rain showers
So I could drown my tears in the rain
Relieve myself of all this pain
It’s hard leaving you
But it’s for the best
Now I see the truth
I know I will get another man to love me like I deserve
I hope I don’t hold your sins against the other men of this world
All this resentment I now hold towards you
I need to find a way to let it go
Throw my bitterness to the wilderness
And welcome tomorrow like the days of spring
All things new; the rebirth of a my being
I’m leaving just the way I came
Of my own free will
Oh, I’m taking my son too
He’s a part of the deal
You leave me alone forever more
15 years of my life I will never get back
But I’ve got the rest of my life to make up for that
See the world like I’ve always dreamed it
Or at least live like I wish it
Do all the things that you averted
Because of your silly, jealous tendencies
I can finally speak to my male friends
Without you throwing temper tantrums
Bye now and don’t you try to stop me
I will send my brother for my things
And don’t you dare throw away anything
I hope you sleep well tonight
If I was you, I would sleep with one eye wide
Open…

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