The Heart Speaks (Battling Demons)

The Heart Speaks (Battling Demons)
By Delroy N. Williams

On my knees looking up
So ashamed of what I have become
A single tear falling from my eye
Because all I can do right now is cry
And even that proves difficult
I’ve dug myself into a world of trouble
Words can’t even help me now
This situation is killing me emotionally
I look fine on the outside
But I’ve been slowly dying spiritually
And only I and the Lord knows why
I’ve kept this pain inside for so long
Now I just can’t find a way to let it out
I try to scream, but can’t make a sound
I hope the Lord understands my heart
Because I’m in need of a brand new start!
Lord, it looks so rough
From this place where I kneel
Will I ever find healing?
Because I’ve been through so much
And I can’t help but feel that’s there much more to come
Take me by the hand, I need your refuge
I’m scared, I must admit
I’m in a ditch, looking up at a summit
Dark thoughts cloud my day
Nightmares haunt my nights
I don’t know what to do next
Feeling like I’m slowing disappearing
Something like evanescence
And that’s has me shook up
One minute I’m fine
The other I’m losing my damn mind
So, so confused
Feeling like the focus of a ruse
And everyone looks on laughing
They all know the plot
But all I can do is assume
Feeling so undervalued
Will I ever find my place in the cold, lonely world?
Or am I going to forever wonder
What’s my purpose here on Earth!

Father, Teach Me To Pray

This is my newest poem; still in edit mode, might still might change it around some time soon.

Father, Teach Me To Pray

By Delroy Nesta Williams

I want to revisit my youth,

Go back in time.

Just to talk to my father,

There is this question that I need him to answer.

Daddy, why you never taught me to pray?

As I reflect,

I’ve heard you curse,

I even saw you smoke,

But I can’t remember a word of prayer

That you spoke!

But Father I ask that you hold my hands,

Force my knees to the floor,

And to the heavens, stretch out my arms.

Recite to me the Lord’s Prayer

Or just scream out Proverbs and Psalms.

All I have to go by right now

Are the teachings of my mother,

Her words were comfort to my ear

And the lessons still linger.

But I would still like to know

The thoughts of my father.